In this book, Sonia Gandhi presents her perspective on the arrival of Maneka Gandhi into her family, the initial relationship between the two sisters-in-law, the gradually growing differences, and the events that led to Maneka leaving the Gandhi family home in 1983. This section of the book is also important because it examines the family relationships of that era, as well as political ambitions and changing equations within the family.
However, it is important to understand that the details in the book are based on Sonia Gandhi's personal recollections and perspectives. Therefore, they should not be considered as independently authenticated confessions of all parties concerned or as final historical conclusions.
Sanjay Gandhi and Maneka met in 1973
According to Sonia Gandhi, Sanjay Gandhi met Maneka Anand in the last months of 1973. At the time, Maneka was about ten years younger than him and still a minor. In her book, Sonia describes her personality as a spirited, lively, and conversational young woman.
The two were married within about a year of meeting. According to official parliamentary records, Maneka Gandhi and Sanjay Gandhi were married on September 29, 1974. Maneka was 18 years old at the time.
After marriage, Maneka Gandhi became a part of the family. Sonia Gandhi initially found the arrival of a younger sister-in-law in the house a pleasant experience. She writes that Maneka was quite talkative and cheerful. Sometimes she would sit and joke with the other women in the family, and Sonia would join in their conversation.
According to Sonia, her daughter Priyanka Gandhi also used to visit her aunt Maneka in her room and listen to her stories. In the early days, there were no major conflicts within the family that might have foreshadowed the future deterioration of relations.
How did the distance between 'Baharuni' and 'Chhoti Bahu' increase?
An interesting part of Sonia Gandhi's book is related to the addresses given to both the daughters-in-law in the family.
Sonia was the eldest daughter-in-law of the family, so the household staff addressed her as "Bahu Rani." Meanwhile, Maneka was called "Chhoti Bahu" (younger daughter-in-law) because she was Sanjay Gandhi's wife.
Sonia writes that she considered both of them equal daughters of the family. According to her, both should have respect and a place in the family. But she felt that Maneka might have viewed being called the "younger daughter-in-law" as a sign of lesser importance.
The important point here is that Sonia Gandhi's mention of Maneka's possible sentiment is based on her own assumption. This should not be taken as Maneka Gandhi's own statement.
According to Sonia, over time, the atmosphere at home began to change. Disagreements began to arise over small matters. She says that when Maneka would become angry with her and speak harshly, she would often remain silent to maintain peace in the house. However, when she felt things had gone too far, she would retaliate.
Troubles were brewing in Sanjay and Maneka's relationship.
In the book, Sonia Gandhi has not only mentioned the disagreements between her and Maneka, but has also written about the increasing tension in the marital relationship between Sanjay and Maneka.
According to her, the arguments between the two gradually became audible to other family members. Sonia claims that in times of anger, Maneka would sometimes use language that would be considered inappropriate in a family environment.
However, Sonia also admits that it would not have been easy for Maneka to adjust as a new daughter-in-law in a big and busy joint family at a young age.
The book also states that Maneka's social nature and her increasing involvement in Sanjay Gandhi's political activities began to affect her relationships with other family members.
1978 elections and differences between Rajiv and Sanjay
In her book, Sonia Gandhi also mentions the political events of 1978. Following the political changes following the Emergency and the electoral defeat, there were many discussions within the Congress and the Gandhi family.
According to Sonia, Rajiv Gandhi was displeased with some of Sanjay's political decisions and style. He believed that Sanjay acted hastily in many matters and did not heed the advice of his mother, Indira Gandhi.
The book recounts a family conversation in which Rajiv Gandhi expressed his displeasure with Sanjay. According to Sonia, Rajiv blamed Sanjay's decisions for his mother's political position.
This account helps us understand the tension within the family at the time. However, the details of this conversation are also based on Sonia's personal recollections.
The situation worsened after the death of Sanjay Gandhi.
Sanjay Gandhi died in a plane crash on June 23, 1980. This incident was a major shock to the Gandhi family. At the time, Sanjay was a member of the Lok Sabha and a rising leader in Indian politics. The date of his death is also confirmed by the official proceedings of the Lok Sabha.
After Sanjay's death, Maneka Gandhi faced questions about her personal life as well as her political future. Her son, Feroze Varun Gandhi, was very young at the time.
Sonia Gandhi writes that Maneka's mother and some of her political supporters wanted her to play a significant role in Sanjay's political legacy. However, Indira Gandhi felt it was premature to give Maneka such a significant responsibility at the age of 23. According to Sonia, Indira wanted Maneka to first care for her young child and then consider a future political role.
Maneka left the Gandhi family home in March 1983.
One of the most talked about parts of the book is the incident of March 1983, when Maneka Gandhi left Indira Gandhi's official residence.
According to Sonia Gandhi, Maneka celebrated her son Varun Gandhi's first birthday at Vasundhara Raje's residence. Sonia viewed this as a significant event in the political climate of the time, as Vasundhara Raje was perceived by her as being close to Indira Gandhi's politically opposed ideology.
The book recounts a dispute between Indira Gandhi and Maneka Gandhi after she returned from abroad. According to Sonia, Indira Gandhi presented Maneka with two options: either she should withdraw from some of her activities or stay away from home.
Following this, Maneka Gandhi left the Gandhi family home. The Delhi High Court's judgment of May 10, 1984, also records that Maneka Gandhi left her residence at 1, Safdarjung Road, on March 23, 1983, with her son Varun.
Sonia described the entire incident as fraught with public accusations and controversies. According to her, a private family matter gradually became a public political controversy.
It also came to the fore regarding Varun Gandhi
legal dispute
After Maneka left the house, a legal dispute arose within the family regarding the right to meet her son, Varun Gandhi. Sonia writes in her book that the family was pursuing legal efforts to secure the right to meet Varun.
A 1984 Delhi High Court judgment confirms that legal cases involving Varun were ongoing between Maneka Gandhi and Indira Gandhi. Thus, the dispute was not limited to a family dispute but reached the court.
In later years, Maneka Gandhi carved out a distinct political identity for herself. She contested the 1984 Lok Sabha elections and subsequently joined various political parties. In 2004, she joined the Bharatiya Janata Party.
Sonia also wrote about the relationship between Indira and Feroze Gandhi.
Another important episode in this book concerns the relationship between Indira Gandhi and her husband, Feroze Gandhi. Sonia writes that Indira and Feroze's marriage had many ups and downs, but their emotional bond remained intact.
According to Sonia, Indira once told her that she regretted the mistakes she had made in her relationship with Feroze. She also said that Indira advised her not to make such a drastic decision as breaking up a marriage out of anger or sadness.
The book also details Feroze Gandhi's health and final years. Feroze Gandhi died of a heart attack on September 8, 1960. This date is confirmed by the historical records of the Lok Sabha.
According to Sonia, Indira and Feroze may have had their differences, but the emotional aspect of their relationship always remained important.
A family's personal story and the changing relationship between politics
Sonia Gandhi's 'Belonging: A Journey of Love' is not just an account of the political journey of the Gandhi family, but it also gives space to the emotions, disagreements, relationships and personal struggles within the family.
The episode of "Bahurani" and "Chhoti Bahu" illustrates how initial affinity within a family can turn into disagreements over time. The growing distance between Maneka and Indira Gandhi after Sanjay Gandhi's death further exacerbated this family feud.
this book provides an important account of the personal history of the Gandhi family
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